La Mode Est Morte! Vive La Mode!

If I were a millionaire instead of a thousandaire right now, I’d be head-to-toe Roland Mouret. Those gemstone colored, diamond-cut suit dresses for fall, and the canary and sea-blue satin dresses for spring. Pretty much everything he makes is flawlessly tailored and genuinely beautiful. I’d occasionally slip in a copy-cat jumper by up-and-comer Abaeté, a non-copy-cat jumper by Imitation of Christ (perhaps with one of their denim dicks) or a cotton Doo.Ri trench coat, with some LaCoste flats. And I’m feeling Marc Jacobs weightless knit bling from fall and his just released unitard idea, but for fall, not spring.


As noted on Totes Umbrellas - which you should read unless you're a gaylord, or perhaps especially if you are a gaylord – Max’s unbelievable short film, Kinetescope, will be featured at New Haven’s film (read: cum) festival. Max is too modest to promote himself, so let me say: the B&W masterpiece is the product of tireless drug use and compulsive exercise. Story goes that he had sex for a week and a half non-stop while editing, which is what gave the film its raw, hungry passion, and beautiful cuts. That poor girl had to be hospitalized, and no one could repair the eliptical, one of the gears from which was missing.

Why I'm making Max's film into a post about porn, I'm not entirely sure. But everyone should see it. It will be featured in the Opening Night Shorts Program, Thur 9.22, 9:30pm, as well as Fri 9.23, 5:30 pm, in the Short Program IV, at Criterion Cinemas (Temple Square, New Haven, CT), $10 gen / $7 students.


Petra Nemcova, whom I previously mentioned as your potential future employer, was given a shoutout in Michael Musto’s Village Voice column this week:

Then came the original Tsunami Sue, model PETRA NEMCOVA, whose real-life reality show had her famously clinging to a Thai tree with the kind of tenacity most people I know use to clutch onto a gift bag. She was co-hosting the opening of JAMISON ERNEST's Yellow Fever store on Stanton Street, where I was crass enough to smirk and point out the big tree outside. Did it give her weird feelings? "No!" Nemcova (whom I call Petra von Can) told me, beaming. "I love trees! One saved my life!" A balanced Czech like Ivana, she said her tsunami experience ended up dramatically changing her values, but fortunately those still include going to kooky parties like this. "It's about enjoying every moment, because the next moment it could be gone," she said wisely as I dug so hard into the gift bag my fingers bled.

Now doesn’t she sound like a sweetheart, and a hedonist to boot!

In other news, fuck hummingbirds. Please think of a new design element, designers. And musicians. And jewelry people. Yeesh.

(No offense to Cantora Records, whom I love beyond recognition)

I wish Kevin Federline were my daddy, or at least my baby’s daddy,

~Andrea

PS. A certain someone had sex. I think she’d want you to know.